A neighbor who we’ll call Hey-bhor for now, came my direction the other day. I got nervous and sort of walked more quickly with my dog. He came even closer. I thought he was going to call me for walking the other way. I just wanted a breather, a moment of quiet after work and didn’t want him to feel hurt that I didn’t want to chat. Well he came over apologizing for saying hi to me the week before. When he extended this harmless greeting I slowly leaned toward him to say hello back and fell off the bicycle I was learning to ride. I was totally fine and just got a couple of easy breezy bruises that resulted in no problems long term. I laughed as I forgot that where you look is where you go when you ride a bike, or I guess for me even when I’m parked on my bike and say hello.
When Hey-bhor came by he was intending to kindly extend an apology and then I accidentally stepped on dog poop. He then apologized for that! Hey-bhor was feeling badly about my bike stumble or that I stepped in poop. I was feeling badly that I didn’t want to chat after work and didn’t even want to say I didn’t want to chat. Really Hey-bhor and I had all these thoughts and feelings about not harming one another when really I thought nothing of the stumble relating to him and of course not the poop either. He too didn’t even notice my quiet time redirection after work. It’s funny when Hey-bhor and I were in our own worlds with our perceptions. This happens sometimes. Sometimes a bunch of stuff is happening and we don’t notice it, but sometimes we have a hypervigilance or misunderstanding with what we think someone else is thinking or feelings. I’m grateful for little Hey-bhor moments where we can simply notice discrepancies.
I’m wishing for lots of moments of noticing all the times my perception is a little funky this week! And hopefully bringing more humor and less poop into the next time this happens ( :
Soft Heart Psychology 