Dear Soft Hearted Loves,
When did we turn healing and connection into a sales pitch? How did we turn our sacred field to the hands of corporations? I left a medical corporation that provided mental health care to their patients through an all-in-one health package. It’s the most prominent health care provider on the West Coast that I know of and serves many patients. You can come in, get your therapy, get your blood drawn, and grab your meds all before you leave the building. I thought I would be able to serve mainly BIPOC LGBTQIA young people and their families and that made my heart happy. I saw young folks dealing with some of the same wounds I walked through around that age and I felt so grateful to get them connected with their supports early on and not later.
At said corporation I also realized I was part of the “McDonald’s Mental Health” as a friend called it. I saw myself and other bilingual providers seeing 8-10 patients a day. We were drained and expected to do more for less. We were expected to look corporate while selling their brand of sanity. I am now deeply grateful for not being able to hold the load the corporation folks wanted from me. I am so grateful for leaving that health corporation before I broke too much to repair. Isn’t it funny how we can be grateful for something we didn’t get or something that didn’t work out?
I still see creams, oils, therapies and journeys being sold under this guise of providing happiness. “Buy this oil and you’ll be smiley like this smiley lady!” “Go on this retreat and you’ll get your happy back!” While I do provide my services for a fee, I try to assure people I’m simply a mirror for them to see that they have everything they need inside. My colleagues and friends who sell beautiful products are trying to earn a living wage attempting to share their healing for those who want to live authentically them and not incorporating something to “fix” symptoms. We believe in supporting people to seeing the resource they have right there without a thing. If they happen to benefit from reading this blog, buying that journal, or paying for that therapy then cool. But we know that each one of those products is a mirror of the person’s own resources with or without a blog, journal, or therapy.
I see folks as their four year old selves with all the forgiveness and gentleness we’d grant to a little one, but none of the shame and punishment. With that gentleness we hope they can see they’ve got what they need inside their heart and communities to be authentically them. Doing that doesn’t require burning out a therapist by asking her to see 10 patients a day in multiple languages, do case management, and all from in a Eurocentric, corporate guise of selling sanity. Being a healing provider is an honor for me and I’m so grateful I could leave the pressure of the sales pitch for health and return to a place of reminding folx they’ve already got what they need.
So I hope you have someone in your life seeing you as your most kind, innocent self. I hope you have someone reflecting that you’ve got everything you need right here.
With kindness,
Dr. Joharchi
Soft Heart Psychology 