Dear Soft Hearted Loves,
Maybe you’ve been having some feelings. I want to say it’s okay if you have sadness in your heart, some uneasiness in your mind, or feelings of loneliness. It’s all okay no matter what. In fact noticing the feelings at all is change.
Let’s talk a little bit about feeling feelings in the body rather than trying to think them out in the mind or analyze the feelings. I’m not saying checking in with your body will reduce your pain or suffering. I’m simply saying we can feel the full extent of our feelings through the body. I recommend that we feel rather than bypass, soothe or cope. Don’t get me wrong, we all side step feelings sometimes and that may be what is needed to get through something.
It’s just that a temporary distraction may stuff down the feelings or put them somewhere else, but our bodies know what’s up. Our bodies are these really smart things that we demonize, abuse, and escape. I’ve done it too, I get it. It’s just that feeling feelings rather than analyzing thoughts or escaping has been more helpful clinically and personally.
Any body scan meditation can help or a quick face check where you see how the forehead, jaw, and shoulders feel can be helpful. I briefly notice tension in the forehead, clenching of the jaw, or high shoulders throughout the day. While this noticing does allow me to release these areas, it’s actually meant for nothing more than simply checking in with my body. Our bodies know what’s up even if we don’t. It’s okay to feel feelings. You can let us know what comes up as you give yourself and your inner parts space to feel feelings and sensations. Great job reparenting by letting yourself feel.
With kindness,
Dr. Joharchi
Soft Heart Psychology 